I feel like the fact that, for many years now, you've been able to carry your phone in your pocket with you wherever you go has desensitized you to the need for appropriate phone etiquette. Now, I may be biased in this issue, since the only type of cell phone I've ever owned is prepaid, and is rarely used. Regardless, I feel like you need a few things pointed out to you.
Before there were cell phones, you would never have given out my number so that your friends, family, and coworkers could reach you when you were visiting me in my home. By extension, it is rude for you to answer your cell phone while you are visiting me in my home. If we are in your home, that's different, because before cell phones you might have received calls on your land line and it would have been acceptable for you to answer it. Mind you, my husband and I don't answer our land line when we have guests over because we feel like it's not very 'host-ly', but I would have not been offended if you had. So, I'm not going to take it personally if you answer your cell phone. (I will not think you are super host-ly though.)
It was totally unheard of for you to pass out a restaurant's number so that every one of your friends, family, or coworkers could reach you when we are out eating together. Your babysitter or someone in an emergency situation, maybe… So there are some circumstances in which I will not be groaning inside at the complete rudeness of answering your phone at the table. And really, if you have to talk THAT loud to be heard, maybe just step outside. Coming back inside is optional.
You cannot talk on a home phone in a car. I realize there were car phones, but I think we all know those were a big mistake. You need to turn your phone off when you get into the car. Under no circumstance do I ever want to see you using your phone in the car. No texting, no phone to the ear, and if you're using that ear piece, I want you to know that it doesn't allow you the amount of focus on your driving that you think it does. Also, you look ridiculous and slightly crazy like you are talking to yourself. (This especially applies to when you are not in a car and are walking down the street, or – heaven forbid – sitting at a table in a restaurant.)
9 times out of 10, when I see a driver do something stupid on the road, I look more closely to find that person is using their cell phone. 50% of the time it's an ear piece. You are just not as good at it as you think you are.
And if I'm in the car with you, and you would otherwise be talking to me, but instead I'm awkwardly staring out the window because you're on your cell phone, know that I'm irritated. This irritation is only slightly lessened if I'm the one driving.
And if you are using your cell phone while children are in the car, I kinda wanna pull you over and smack you.
And finally, I just want to point out that "Where you at?" is horribly bad grammar.
I realize that cell phones have become such an integrated part of our society, that some of this will come as a shock to you. You don't mean to be rude, but the convenience of cell phones has made you forget your manners. I'm just hoping to enlighten you a bit.
Sincerely,
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I completely AGREE!! With everything! I am amazed at how many people ask me - 'oh don't you want to get that?' - while my cell phone rings when I'm at their home, in their car, or I have guests at my home. Unless there is an emergency or information that's necessary in that moment (which I carefully explain before answering) I agree - it's rude!
Yes, yes, yes. Its like people think they HAVE to answer the phone. It is a convenience, but that doesn't mean they have to talk for an hour to their mom at my house. My husband is a loud phone talker and it drives me nuts, even on the land line though. I love him so I forgive him and try not to pick on him too much. :)
Oh goodness, I've had people get mad at me because I didn't answer my cell phone when they called. Geesh, sorry I didn't answer your call when I was going 75 MPH ON THE FREEWAY! Since when did it become a rule that you have to be reachable every second of every day? And I agree, it is so irritating to be out with someone who is talking on their phone instead of to you. Unless you're an on call doctor or some other emergency profession don't answer it!
Dani and I were sitting in Church in San Diego when DURING THE SACRAMENT, a fellow's phone rang, and HE ANSWERED IT! "I can't talk now, I"m in Church," he whispered into it, tho we could hear. We were appalled.
Leah - I love your blog letters (Dear Smoker, Dear Cell Phone User). They make me smile and I always agree one hundred percent with them. I see people attached to their cell phones and I wonder if they remember the time, not too far back, when they lived without it. We only have a prepaid and use it rarely, so I still fill like I live without it. And we are happy with it. We don't want people to be able to get ahold of us non-stop. We leave our house, to leave our house, not to talk to someone on the phone, which we could do at home. Anyway, I want to yell a big, loud AMEN.
Very well said. A surprising number of people also answer their phones during a dental visit, even while they are getting their own teeth treated. I've also had parents answer the phone while I'm in the middle of a consultation with them about their child's teeth. The only thing you forgot to mention was the obnoxious ring tone, usually set on ”loud.“ Ugh.
Amen! We don't own a cell phone, and we like it that way.
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